So I was driving down the highway in my new Mercedes doin' about 80mph. I see red and blue flashin' lights in my rear-view mirror. I think to myself, 'I'm in a new Mercedes! Who could catch me?' So I start speedin' up 90mph, 100mph, 110mph, 120mph. He's still there. So I pull over and the cop takes my license and papers without sayin' a word. He comes back and says, "I've been pulling people over all day for speeding. If you can give me an excuse that I haven't heard, I'll let you go." So I sit there for a second then say to the officer, "Well, sir, my wife left me to live with a police officer the other day. So I thought you were trying to give her back!"
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