Hi-tech Redneck


Backup - What you do when you run across a varmint in the woods.


Bug - The reason you give for calling in sick to work.


Byte - What your pitbull done to cousin Billy-Bob.


Chip - Cow pasture surprises that you try not to step in.


Terminal - When yer about to die.


Crash - When you go to Jethro's party uninvited.


Digital - The art of counting on yer fingers.


Diskette - Female who dances the disco.


Fax - What you lie about to the IRS and yer wife.


Hacker - Uncle Willie after 32 years of smoking.


Hardcopy - Picture used to help you select a tattoos.


Internet - Where cafeteria ladies put their hair.


Keyboard - Where you hang the keys to yer John Deere.


Mac - Big John's favorite fast food.


Megahertz - How your head feels after 13 beers.


Modem - What you do when the grass gets so high that it hides the pickup truck that you have on blocks in the front yard.


Mouse Pad - Where Mickey and Minnie call home.


Network - Scoopin' a big fish before it breaks yer line.


ROM - Where the pope lives.


Screen - Keeps mosquitoes outta yer trailer.


Serial Port - A red wine you drink with yer breakfast.


Superconductor - The guy who yells "All Aboard" the loudest at a train station.


SCSI (pronounced scuzzi) - What you call your two-week-old underwear.

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