Collection of "You Know You're a Redneck When..."

This is a collection of a few of the Redneck lines I've heard (and can remember) over the years . . .

You know you're a redneck when:

You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

Your wife weighs more than your refrigerator.

Your shopping list only has beer on it.

The biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

You move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.

You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

You mow your lawn and find a car.

Your "pet" eats more than you.

You can spit without opening your mouth.

You refer to sixth grade as "your senior year".

You refer Chuck Norris as: God, Santa Claus, and the Harvest Man.