Change a light bulb

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?


Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air.


Pentecostal: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against spirit of darkness.


Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.


Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.


Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.


Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the old one was.


Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.


Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb.


However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for
you, that is fine.


You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including:


incandescent, fluorescent three way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.


Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb.


Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.


Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.


Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.


Amish: What's a light bulb?