He orders a drink and notices there's a mean, weather beaten pirate next to him at the bar. The pirate has a hook, a peg leg, and an eye patch. After a few drinks the sailor gets the courage to ask the pirate how he lost his leg.
The pirate tells him, "We were in the midst of a raging storm, a wave crashed over the deck and swept me off inter the sea. Before I was rescued, a shark swam up and bit off me leg!"
"That's quite the story" the sailor responds. "What about the hook?"
"Arr, we were boarding a vessel, swords were flying, and in the fray, I got me hand chopped off!"
"Wow, that's another impressive story. What's the story behind the eye patch?"
"It twas a beautiful day, while I was gazing up at the clear blue sky, a bird flew over and pooped in me eye!"
"You lost your eye to bird poop?" the sailor asks incredulously.
"Well," responds the pirate, "It twas the first day with me hook..."
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.