A man was at the edge of a cliff about to jump off...

...when he hears a voice, "Don't do that, I can help you..."
He turns around to see a very old, haggered lady in ripped clothes. The lady painfully walks up to him smelling like a garbage bin.
She slowly looks him up and down and says, "This may seem a bit weird but I am your fairy godmother, and I can fix whatever is wrong son, like many things in life, there is a catch...but first tell me, what's wrong?"
The man asks, "What is the catch?"
The lady replies, "Before I can fix your problems you have to perform oral sex on me, but I promise, I can fix whatever is wrong in your life...no problem is too big for your fairy godmother."
The man thinks to himself, 'what the hell, I was just about to kill myself so why not give this a try', "Okay, let's try this."
The lady takes off her stinking jacket and lays it out on the ground. She then removes her pants, which are stiff with dirt, then she peels off her underwear and lays down on the jacket. Spreading her legs, there is a god awful smell, but, gagging and choking the man somehow manages to perform oral sex.
Afterwards, the lady is laying on her jacket with a big smile on her face and the man is furiously wiping his mouth with his shirt sleeve, "Well, I did my part, now you fix my problems..."
"Okay, but first, tell me how old are you son?"
"Well, I am 39."
"...and you still believe in fairy godmothers?"