The man says he wants to buy a parrot, and the owner says, "I've got the perfect pet right here. This parrot isn't expensive, and he's guaranteed to talk. Guaranteed. You can't lose." So the man buys the parrot, a cage, and a cover.
A week later the man returns to the store and says, "That parrot you sold me doesn't talk. Not a word." The owner says, "Now let me get this straight. You took the bird home, took off the cover, he walks up the little gold ladder and he doesn't talk?" "What little gold ladder?" "You don't have the little gold ladder? You have to have the gold ladder. It's $25." "Oh. Well, OK." The man buys the ladder and goes home.
He's back a week later with the same complaint. The owner says," Now let me get this straight. You took him home, took off the cover, he walks up the little gold ladder, looks in the little gold mirror, and he doesn't talk?" "What little gold mirror?" "Oh, you don't have the little gold mirror. You have to. It's $25." "Oh. OK." And the man buys the mirror and goes home.
The man comes back a week later - the parrot still doesn't talk. The owner says, "Now let me get this straight. You took him home, took off the cover, he walks up the little gold ladder, he looks at himself in the little gold mirror, rings the little gold bell-" "Here's $25, give me the damn bell." And he storms out.
He's back the next week. "That parrot you sold me died." "He did? I'm really sorry to hear that...... Tell me, did he ever talk?" "Well, once near the end ... he looked up at me and he said, "Food...."
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