A man walks into a bar with an octopus...

He goes up to the bartender and puts the octopus on the bar. The man says to the bartender, "I bet you $100 that this octopus can play any instrument in the bar."

The bartender points to a piano in the corner and says, "Alright, let's hear it." So, the man puts the octopus in front of the piano and it gets fancy, starts playing some Beethoven, then Piano Man to get the crowd really going. After a raucous applause from the bar the man goes to the bar tender with his hand extended.

The bartender says, "Wait, a sec." He goes to the back and comes out with a guitar that he hands to the octopus. The octopus tunes it a little bit, gives a strum, and then really takes it away with some Freebird. The crowd loves it. The man walks up to the bartender and says, "Alright the crowd loves him you gotta pay up!"

The bartender says to him, "Hold on, let me get another." He goes to the back, comes out with a clarinet, and hands it to the octopus.

The octopus grabs it and sloppily puts it in its mouth then begins to play. It gets through it but not too well and this makes the man nervous. He goes up to the bartender and demands his winnings.

"Hold on," says the bartender, "one more, I promise!"

He goes to the back and comes out with bagpipes, then hands it to the octopus.

The octopus looks at them for a second, begins to wrap it's tentacles all around the bagpipes, and squeezes making the bagpipes wheeze.

The man goes up to the octopus and nervously says, "Well, can you play it?"

"Play it?", asks the octopus, "Once I get the pajamas off I'm gonna fuck it!"