A man walks into a bar, followed by an ostrich and a cat...

...he walks to the bar, the ostrich as well, the cat jumps up onto a stool. He asks the bartender, "Can I get a pint of Guinness?", the ostrich speaks up, says "I'll have one too", the cat says "me too, but i'm not paying". Bartender says that'll be $18.90. The man reaches into his pocket, passes a handful of notes and coins over. The bartender notices it's the exact change. "So what exactly is going on here?", he asks. The man says "well, I was down on the beach, and I found an old lamp. I picked it up, and a genie appeared! said I could have three wishes. I said, I wish that my right pants pocket would always carry exactly how much money I need".

The bartender is visibly impressed! "That's pure genius", he remarked, "I know guys would wish for a simple million or a Ferrari or whatever, but shit, you're set for life! What else did you wish for?"

The man shrugs and replies, "a chick with long legs and a tight pussy.."

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