The wife says "Honey, I'll do anything you want for you tonight"
Husband replies "Nice! How about a 69er!"
"I can't, I'm on my period!"
"I don't give a fuck!"
"Well" she says, "if you don't care then I certainly don't, let's do it."
So they are going at it for a bit when the dorbell rings, and the husband says "Fuck sakes, who could that be? Go answer the door hun"
She says "Fucking look at me! I'm a mess! I can't answer the door! YOU answer it!"
"Look at my face! I can't go out there looking like this!"
She says "Just tell them you were eating a jam sandwich and got carried away"
"Alright" the man says, and proceeds to answer the door.
It was the mailman. "Hi I have a delivery fo...WHAT IN THE FUCK!?"
Husband says "Ohhh don't mind my face, I was eating a jam sandwich and I got a little crazy with it."
Mailman replies, "Sir I wasn't looking at the jam on your mouth, I was looking at the peanut butter on your forehead."
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