A guy walks into a bar, all battered and bruised...

It looked like he'd just gone 10 rounds with the Klitschko brothers. Blood everywhere.

"God's balls, son, what happened to you?" said the barman.

"Well, I was about to come into the bar when I slipped on a dog turd on the pavement just outside," explained the customer.

"But you're covered in bruises and blood," said the barman. "That can't have happened just from falling over."

"Well, no," said the customer. "I'd picked myself up and was dusting off my jacket when a Hell's Angel came along and he slipped in the turd and fell over as well. So I told him "I just did that.'"

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