A bunch of Jokes told by trans women!

EDIT: Trans people, not just ladies.

Hey all, I just wanted to share some self deprecating humor. Credit for these goes to the folks in /r/asktransgender.

Here we go:

my brother no longer has to put in an effort to be my parents' favourite son :)

You guys know what my favourite dinosaur is? The Trannysaurus Rex

You have to have balls to do what we are doing.

Man up and be a girl.

YOU THROW LIKE A GIRL, GOOD JOB!

You guys know what my favourite dinosaur is? The Trannysaurus Rex

"There's been a petition going around to strip Caitlyn Jenner of her olympic medals... the petition was of course started by the silver medalists." - Conan

What do you do when you see a 6 ft Transgender Woman with broad shoulders and stilletto heels?

Exactly what she tells you

I tell people I transitioned because I was REALLY curious about why girls used the bathroom in couples.

Getting ready to play a board game with a group
Friend 1: "Should we split the teams into couples or do men vs. women? Let's do men vs. women"
Me: "What team would I be on then?"
Friend 1: Puts her head in her hands
Friend 2: "You'd be on both teams. Just switch back and forth between them."

You know hormones have started working as mtf when gay guys start getting attracted to you. You know they're really working when they stop.

Once, when I was having an online drinking session with my friend, I went to go get a pack of cigarettes from the other room (Pre-hormones, and I've quit smoking since).

"Hey, I'll be right back, gotta get cigarettes."
"I don't think you should drive in your condition."
"Why? I'm only dressed like a woman."

How many trans people does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, but before they change it, they have to sit in the dark for one year and think about it to make sure it needs changing then consult 2 electricians.

People ask me if taking T has made my sexuality more fluid, and whether I'm attracted to men or women. I tell them I'm on testosterone; I'm attracted to furniture.

I was being propositioned for a threesome by these two girls at the bar (I am not super attractive, just I managed the bar) and I turned them down. My buds were basically like "dude why the fuck did you turn that down!" my response was "what was I supposed to do, go for it and the. all of a sudden SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER I don't have a penis!"

My dad suffers from male pattern baldness, which also looms in the future of my brother. I (mtf) like to joke that I have a regimen that could solve all their hair loss problems with the teeensy tiny side effect of turning them into women.