A husband comes home to his wife and informs her that he has to go out of town for a couple of weeks for business. This being his first time away from home for so long he was worried that his wife may get lonesome and need some intimate attention while he is gone. The next day he goes to the local sex toy shop and not impressed with the initial selection he asks the gentleman behind the counter for the best dildo money can buy.
The clerk goes to the back and appears with a seemingly ancient dusty wooden box. As he opens the box it reveals an intricately carved dildo. Amazed the husband asks "What is that?!". The clerk simply responds that it is named Voodoo Dick.
The clerk proceeds to tell the man how it works. using some sort of black magic you can command the Voodoo Dick by simply stating "Voodoo Dick!, and then stating where you would like the Voodoo dick to start pleasuring. He ends the conversation with the most important piece of advice. He says "when you are finished with it you must state "Voodoo Dick stop" or command it to move to another part of the body.
The husband throws money at the clerk and runs home. He explains it to his wife in detail and then leaves on his trip.
The first week goes by and the wife decides that she needs a little action and opens the box containing Voodoo dick. struggling to remember the exact commands she finally utters "Voodoo Dick, My pussy!". A slight shimmer surrounds the magical dildo and it raises from its box and starts immediately pounding away at her vagina.
She reaches the most amazing orgasm she has ever experienced. Looking down she states "ok you can stop now". Voodoo dick keeps fucking.
"STOP!" she screams. Voodoo dick keeps fucking.
"QUIT, its hurting now!". Voodoo dick keeps fucking.
In a panic she runs to her car and starts driving to the nearest hospital. The whole time she is speeding down the highway, Voodoo dick is pounding away.
A police officer sees her speeding and pulls her over.
Frantically she tells the whole story to the officer in hopes he will let her go.
The officer, taken back by the story, looks at her and says...
Voodoo Dick my ass!
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