Two jokes here, If you get offend don't come crying to me

*Two Presidents*
President Obama walks in to a barber shop to get his hair cut, Soon after George Bush walks in to get his hair cut. The barbers set to work cutting there hair not talking because they didn't want to start a political debate. When the barber finished with President Obama's hair he asked "would you like some cologne?" Obama said "no thank you Michelle will think I've been in a whore house." The other barber asks George the same question to which he replies, "Sure my wife doesn't know what a whore house smells like."

*A Dream Come True*
A dream Come True One sunny day in January, 2017, an old man approached the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue where he’d been sitting on a park bench. He spoke to the U.S. Marine standing guard and said, “I would like to go in and meet with President Obama. ”The Marine looked at the man and said, “Sir, Mr. Obama is no longer President and no longer resides here. ”The old man said, “Okay,” and walked away. The following day the same man approached the White House and said to the same Marine, “I would like to go in and meet with President Obama. ”The Marine again told the man, “Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Obama is no longer President and no longer resides here. ”The man thanked him and again just walked away. The third day the same man approached the White House and spoke to the very same U.S. Marine, saying, “I would like to go in and meet with President Obama.” The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looked at the man and said, “Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to speak to Mr. Obama. I’ve told you already that Mr. Obama is no longer the President and no longer resides here. Don’t you understand? ”The old man looked at the Marine and said, “Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it.” The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, “See you tomorrow, Sir!”