(for best results, read in the voice of your favorite late night host)
NASA scientists are preparing for a mission to Mars by spending eight months in Hawaii. After eight months in Hawaii, the scientists will then go on a well-earned vacation.
...the Hawaii mission will help astronauts practice doing tequila shots while wearing those giant helmets.
Wal-Mart has announced they will begin offering checking accounts to customers. The checking accounts will give Wal-Mart customers the opportunity to learn about negative numbers.
...expect delays as customers with Wal-Mart checks borrow a pen, find out today’s date, and of course, ask how to spell “Wal-Mart”.
In a contest by Lays, Americans voted against Cappuccino-flavored potato chips. One American said the idea of coffee-flavored potato chips was disgusting, while sipping cold coffee that tastes like a pumpkin.
A new Taylor Swift song on iTunes turned out to be eight seconds of static. It’s already being called her best song ever.
...sure eight seconds of static isn’t great, but wait’ll you hear the remix.
The United States accidentally delivered an airdrop of weapons to ISIS. To show their appreciation, ISIS re-attached a decapitated prisoner’s head.
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.