Three men are on a safari in the Jungle: a Brit, a Frenchman, and an American. While they are traveling, they run into a band of cannibals, and are captured and taken to the village. They are marched into the center of the village, brought right before the door of the hut belonging to the chief.
The chief surveys them, and then announces:
"As are the ways of our people, you will each be killed, skinned and cooked over a flame. Then, we will eat your flesh, use your bones for tools, and build a canoe out of your skins. However, I will grant you one act of mercy, by allowing you to chose the manner of your death."
The Frenchman goes first, and after careful contemplation, requests to die by a sword. He raises the sword, takes a breath and cries "VIVE LA FRANCE!" as he runs himself through.
The Brit goes next, and askes for a clean death by pistol. He loads the gun, puts the end of the barrel to his chin, shouts "GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!" and BAM! blows his brains out.
The American goes last, and after a moment's thought, asks for a fork. The cannibals are confused, but grant him his wish. The man proceeds to stab himself repeatedly in his arms, legs, chest, and face. The cannibals cry out "Good heavens man, what are you doing?" The American shouts:
"SO MUCH FOR YOUR FUCKIN CANOE!"
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