Thoughts

ON MATHEMATICAL TRANSFORMS


A polar bear is a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.


ON PROBLEM SOLVING


When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail. -- Abraham Maslow


ON MATERIALISM


He who dies with the most toys, is still dead.


ON ECONOMICS


The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.


ON PUBLISHING OR PERISHING


I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top. --English Professor, Ohio University


ON POETIC LOVE


When you're swimmin' in the creek And an eel bites your cheek That's a moray! -- Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers


ON MODERNISM


Q: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?


A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.


Q: How many minimalists does it take to change a light bulb?


A: One


ON MATERIAL SCIENCE


Character density: The number of very weird people in the office.


ON EXTINCTION


Save the whales. Collect the whole set.


ON LITERATURE


This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force. -- Dorothy Parker


ON HUMILITY


To err is human, to moo bovine.


ON PROPHECY


The meek shall inherit the earth ---they are too weak to refuse.


ON NUMBERS


Grabel's Law: 2 is not equal to 3 --- not even for very large values of 2.


ON WORLD POLITICS


Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.


ON DRUGS AND DEVELOPMENT


There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to be a coincidence.