The Top 15 Things Overheard During the Lingerie Bowl

15> "Boy, this sure gives new meanings to the phrase 'game of inches,' doesn't it?"


14> "Now *that's* what I call a naked bootleg!"


13> "After further review of the play... I have decided... that I need to further review the play. This time in super slow-motion."


12> "Your bikini wax is a little 'off sides,' dear."


11> "The coach has thrown the 'challenge' flag. Evidently, he doesn't think those things are real."


10> "The ref has called for a measurement... AGAIN."


9> "And at halftime, some lucky fan will get the chance to take a few snaps from center."


8> "Illegal contact, 15-yard penalty -- but MAN, was that hot!"


7> "Our sideline reporter tells us it's only a sprained nipple and they're going to put some ice on it. Let's see if our cameraman can get us a close-up."


6> "Please dump the Gatorade... Please dump the Gatorade... Please dump the Gatorade...."


5> "Peanuts! Ice cold beer! Kleenex and WetNaps!"


4> "Win one for the stripper!"


3> "Hey! Where the hell was she hiding that Sharpie?!?"


2> "The prick is up... and it's wood!!"


1> "The girls have been wide open all day, but nobody seems capable of penetrating the red zone."


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[ Copyright 2004 by Chris White ]