12. We Screw Up More Medical Research Before 9am Than Most People Do All Day
11. We Have More Overzealous Celebrities than the NRA!
10. I'd rather wear nothing, except maybe Versace leather pants.
9. "Don't mistreat animals." Now watch me say that naked.
8. Knuckle sandwiches: The only meat *you'll* be eating, pal.
7. One Mink, Two Mink, Red Mink, Blue Mink
6. We Got Your McNuggets Right Here!
5. A Vegetable Killed Our Pa
4. Come For The Animals, STAY For The Supermodels!
3. You're Just Lucky We're Weak from Malnutrition, Chester!
2. Them Lil' Smokies is Great!
1. Animals: don't look at 'em, don't touch 'em, don't eat 'em, and for God's sake, keep 'em the Hell away from your genitalia!
[ This list copyright 1998 by Chris White ]
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