The Italian

One day I go to Toronto and stay in a bigga hotel.


I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella the waitress I wanna two
pissa toast. She bring me only one piss.


I tella her I wanna two piss; she say, go to toilet - I say, you no
understand, I wanna two piss on my plate. She say you betta no piss
on plate, you sonna ma b*tch! I don't even know lady, she calla me
somma ma b*tch.


Then I go to pharmacia with a cougha. The man he give me candy ana
tell me fa cough! - I don't even know man ana he tella me FA COUGH!


Later I got to eat soma lunch at Ricky's Place, the waitress she
bring me spoon, a knife but no fock. I tella her I wanna fock - She
tell me everybody wanna fock. I tella her, you no understand, I
wanna fock on table. She say you betta not fock on table you sonna
ma b*tch - I not even know lady ana she call me sonna ma b*tch.


So, I go back to my hotel room, an there's no sheet on my bed. I
calla the manager and tella him I wanna sheet, he tell me go to
toilet. So, I say, you no understand, I wanna sheet on bed. He say
you betta not sheet on bed you sonna ma b*tch. I don't even know man
ana he call me sonna ma b*tch!


I go to check out of hotel and man at desk say peace to you. I say
peace on you too!, you sonna ma b*tch! - I GO BACK TO ITALY!!!