Telling Off The Dean

Wouldn't it be nice to tell the Dean of your college what you REALLY think
about him/her? Well, if you like your Dean as much as I like my Dean, then you'd
better keep your mouth shut. I knew I'd get kicked out of the college if I
expressed my true feelings, so I remained silent for the last four years.
But yesterday was my graduation. And as I walked across the stage, the Dean
handed my diploma to me (nicely scrolled and tied with a ribbon).
Once she handed it to me, I could finally tell that what I REALLY thought
about her. So I leaned across her podium and I looked her straight in the eye.
"Hey ," I said. "You're so damn ugly, you could practice birth control just by
leaving the lights on!"
And then I walked off the stage, and went home. I gotta tell you that it felt
just as good as I had imagined it would for the last four years.
Today, I unwrapped my diploma, framed it, and hung it in the living room,
where it proudly exclaims to the world: "In order to receive your diploma,
please present this certificate to the Dean of your college after final grades
have been posted!"