Retirement Day

After 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same
neighborhood, the mailman was going to retire. When he arrived at the first
house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family who roundly and soundly
congratulated him and sent him on his way with a tidy gift envelope.


At the second house, they presented him with a box of fine cigars.


The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.


At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman
in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the
door and up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most
passionate love he had ever experienced!


When he had enough, they went downstairs where she fixed him a giant
breakfast; eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed
orange juice.


When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she
was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom
edge.


'All of this was just too wonderful for words', he said; 'But what's the
dollar for'?


'Well', she said, 'last night, I told my husband that today would be your last
day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give
you, and he said; 'Screw him. Give him a dollar'. 'The breakfast was my idea!!'