Random funny shit I think of

wigger=a white guy trying to act black
obama=a black guy trying to act white

I hope when someone is talking to me and I don't understand,I just stand there hoping it's not a question

Oh you're scared of earwigs going into your ear?Imaging cockroaches going into your cock

I love dogs as much as i love chemistry

I love to stand next to chairs as much as i love throwing them

I stand next to walls to sometimes and sometimes I lean up against them in case their about to fall

My toilet paper thats another story its Charmin too bad its bears i wish they would have put cats on it cuz I love ****

the other day i was wondering what would happen if i threw a ball into the sky

I burn incense sticks to get rid of the bad energy troll just like mr chizzle in grandmas

I love my family without it well I woudnt have a family now would I

i like cars because they have 4 wheels except for my friend joey he has only 3 now cuz they robbed his last week

My bycicle tire got robbed too so now i feel like we're brothers

i like to drink arizona cuz it makes me feel like im in arizona

I love Ice because it melts

I hate when people rob my lighter and consensually rape my papes

I like chocolate cuz it melts like ice but in YOUR mouth

Damn why does Reese witherspoon eat with a fork

maybe ill lose my virginity one day I hope it snows that day

I love R2D2 from starwars because he is the most vulgar character of all time,they beeped out every single word he said.

Why was the band OFFSPRING put together in the summer and not the appropriate season

I am russian btw not rushin only when im late to work

I like the color blue cause its not red

Ps. I GLOW IN THE DARK