The reason it's always so difficult for this President to tell the truth,
the whole truth, and nothing but the truth is because it's usually three
different stories.
--Sam Donaldson
If the President could convince every woman in America that the Bible says
oral sex is not adultery, he'd even have my vote.
--Newt Gingrich
What's wrong with extending my probe? The President did the same thing.
--Kenneth Starr
The special prosecutor is asking me to give oral testimony to the entire
Grand Jury.
--Monica Lewinsky
Shouldn't the President be held to the same standards as a TV sportscaster?
--Marv Albert
The President should promise to spend the rest of his life trying to find
the real person who had oral sex with the intern.
--OJ Simpson
If I had to spend all day trying to find jobs for every bimbo who swore
she didn't have sex with the president, I'd never get any of my own work
done.
--Vernon Jordan
The president should take up skiing.
--Al Gore
If you're looking for me this week, I'll be in the bunker.
--Saddam Hussein
Practicing safe sex in the Clinton White House means making sure the door
is locked.
--George Stephanopoulos
In last week's Cabinet meeting, the president asked us to go out and win
one for the zipper.
--Madeliene "Aunt Bea" Albright
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.