And the Englishman goes: "Fuck me, my wife keeps making me these roast chicken sandwiches for lunch. I swear lads, if I get this shite again tomorrow, I'm jumping off this fucking roof!"
The Scotsman goes: "Fouck meh, laddiehs, my foucking wife keeps mehking me thes roost beef sandwheches. If I get 'em egen, I'm jumping'off this fouking ruf!"
The Paddy Irishman goes: "Fck meh, I get this ham sanwich, like. If I get'em egen, I'll joihn in, like!"
So, the next day comes along. The same sandwiches again. They all jump to their death.
So, the funeral's on. The Englishwoman's in tears: "Why didn't I switch the sandwiches up!" The Scotswoman's in tears with the same complaint. But the Paddy Irishwoman's *fuming.* When everyone asks her why at the funeral, she replies:
"'cos dhat fcking dopeh coont fixed 'ees owhn sandwiches, like!"
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.