One day, a kid heard her parents arguing.

She heard them yelling out bitch and bastard a couple of times. The kid intervened and asked them what does bitches and bastards mean. The mom said those words mean ladies and gentlemen.
A week later, the kid was watching TV with her dad. Later, a Victoria's Secret commercial came on, uttering the following words a couple of times: bras and panties. The kid asked her dad for the meaning of the words and he said they mean coats and hats.
A few days passed and the kid saw her mom failing to put a couple of model plane pieces together and she heard her yell, "Fuck!" The kid questioned, "What does 'fuck' mean?" The mom replied, "Fuck means to 'put' something."
On the same day the kid saw her dad putting on cologne. Then, the dad accidentally sprayed some in his mouth and shouted, "Shit!" The kid, again, asked for the meaning of the word. After the dad flushed his mouth with water, he said shit means cologne.
A month later, during Christmas Eve, the kid's extended family came to her house for a special dinner. The kid answered the door and happily greeted them, "Good evening bitches and bastards. Please hang your bras and panties on the rack and wait for a few minutes. My dad is busy putting shit on his face and my mom is fucking the turkey on top of the dinner table."

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