It was a beautiful day on the beach and a gay man was enjoying the weather and sights. Suddenly, he sees a man with the most perfect chest hair that he has ever seen in his life. He works up the courage and asks "Excuse me sir, but how did you get such perfect chest hair?". The gorgeous man responds, "It's quite simple really, each night before bed I apply a thin layer of Vaseline all over my chest and abs. Give it a few weeks and boom you'll have full coverage." The gay man thanks the beautiful hairy fella and rushes home. That evening the gay man is standing in front of the mirror smearing Vaseline on his chest and stomach when his boyfriend comes home. The boyfriend says "Keith! What the hell are you doing?!?" To which Keith replies and tells him the story of the man with the perfect chest hair. The boyfriend then exclaims, "You've got to be the dumbest faggot I know, because if that were true, you'd have a ponytail two-foot long coming out of your ass!"
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