It's 1985 and Madonna's giving a huge party to celebrate the success of "Like a Virgin"...

Tina Turner is invited.

She kinda look sad, so Madonna asks her how she could put a bright smile on her face.

-Sex, with a man, that is. That's been a loooong time, my Dear. I feel like it's never gonna happen again and I so much miss a man's manhood between my legs...

-Don't worry, Honey, Madonna says. I always invite the most eclectical crowd to ensure everyone's needs and urges get satisfied. One hour ago, Cary Grant arrived and he kinda implied, he'd gladly have some coloured meat for supper...

-*The* Cary Grant? OMG!

-OK, Sweetie, get to the second floor and choose yourself a nice room. I'm telling Cary and he'll come to (and all over you) very soon.

Tina then get to a nice room full of mirrors and undress before lying on the heart-shaped bed.

Cary arrives 2 minutes later, panting (that's a big colonial house and there aren't any lifts).

He gently sits on the bed near Tina, strokes her her then begin to kiss her neck.

She grabs him and starts mounting him for an-hour long rodeo. They both enjoy themselves loud enough for people to begin snitching around the door's key hole.

Cary finally falls on his back and tells Tina:

-Love, it was amazing, I now need a little time to reload my pacemaker's batteries. Please, be a Darling and hold my penis in both of your loving hands while I nap, I won't be long.

Tina does so, contemplating the ravaged body that just took her to Heaven.

A while after, Cary emerges and the rodeo starts again and again, and again. Between each of these, Cary asks Tina to hold his penis with both hands while he sleeps.

In the end, she just has to ask:

-Why do you want me to hold your penis in my hands when you sleep?

-Love, last time I slept with a negress, she stole my wallet.

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