It was a while back so it's not a perfect transcript, plus imagine a nice English accent telling the joke, and it was probably posted here before but, here goes:
A man's car breaks down on a winding road far from anything. He notices a gate going up a hill leading to a small bar. He follows the gate, gets inside the bar and asks the bartender if he can phone a tow truck. The bartender let's him.
After he calls the tow truck the man takes a seat at the bar, and says "Thanks, the tow truck is gonna be a while" then orders a guinness.
After a bit of silence the bartender says "Hey, did you notice that nice long gate outside the bar? I built it by hand, pretty nice gate, wouldn't you say?"
The man nods and replies "yeah, it's a nice gate"
The bartender mumbles "You think they'd call me Billy the gate builder, but no..."
The man continues to sip his drink
The bartender then says "you see this nice hardwood floor? I placed each plank by hand, don't you think it's nice?"
The man nods and replies "yeah it's nice"
The bartender mumbles " you think they'd call me Billy the floor placer but no..."
The man continues to sip.
The bartender points at his drink and says "you see that guinness? I think I pulled it pretty nice, don't you think?"
The man nods and replies "yeah it's nicely pulled"
The bartender mumbles again "you think they'd call me Billy the guinness puller, but no..."
The man, a little weirded out, continues to sip
The bartender then yells "BUT YOU FUCK ONE GOAT..."
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