...Both parties act like he's their mascot; like he's on the sidelines with pom-poms for their agenda. So I say get rid of the middleman, America and just vote for Jesus Christ of Nazareth. Who wouldn't want to vote for a peaceful, radical, nonviolent revolutionary who hung around with lepers, hookers and criminals; a man who never spoke English, was not an American citizen, was anti-wealth, completely anti-death penalty, anti-public prayer - yes he was motha' fucha', Matthew 6.5 - anti-public prayer but never once anti-gay, never once mentioned abortion, never once technically mentioned premarital sex, never called the poor lazy, never fought for tax cuts for the wealthiest Nazarenes, never asked a leper for a fuckin' co-pay, and was a long-haired, brown-skinned, homeless, unarmed, anti-slut shaming, community organizing, Palestinian Jew. -John Fugelsang
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