How to catch an Elephant.

You go out to the African Savannah, looking to catch an elephant. How do you do it? Well, it's very simple.

You go out to the middle of the plains, and take a shovel, and as much paper and paper products as you can bring out there. Now, it might take a while to dig a hole big enough, but it's worth it to catch that elephant.

Now, after you've dug the hole, you dump all the paper into it. Remember, this has to be a hole big enough for an elephant, so it needs to be a lot of paper, as well. After dumping all the paper in, you light it on fire, so it's a huge bonfire. Smoke and ash will be flying everywhere, but this isn't the time you want to spring into action.

The next morning, you go back to the hole. It'll be full of burnt-up paper, and ash, but not much else. Wait until an Elephant shows up. They always do.

Now, when the elephant is looking into the hole, wondering what's going on, you sneak up riiight behind it. Slowly, and surely. That's the way you need to be. And, when it's distracted...

You kick it in the ash-hole.