A red head, a brunette, and a blonde are stranded on an island, but can see the mainland off in the distance. Not feeling any sense of danger, the gang decides to race back home.
"How about this," suggests the brunette, "we'll all swim back, doing a breast stroke, and the last one to make it has to buy drinks for us all."
The red head and the brunette make it back in about an hour, but the blonde is nowhere to be found.
Two days later, the blonde shows up, wet and clearly exhausted.
"You guys were cheating! I saw you using your arms!"
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A blonde walks into a hardware store, buys a microwave, and leaves. The next day, she returns the microwave.
"I couldn't get the damn thing to change channels."
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