The reason that their are only 49 contestants in the Miss America Contest is because nobody wants to wear a banner that says "IDAHO"
My mind is like a bear trap. Rusty and illegal in 37 states.
My neighbour knocked on my door at 2 AM! Can you believe it? He's lucky I was up playing with my Heavy Metal band!
Every day, you beat your previous record of consecutive days alive.
Fire fighting is like sex - The most important things are Size, equipment and technique.
Politicians and diapers have a lot in common. They both should be changed frequently, and for the same reason.
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