Ed and Tom's Butcher Shop

There were once two brothers, Ed and Tom. They owned a butcher shop together, with Tom in the front on the register and Ed in the back chopping meat.

One fine day, Ed is chopping meat in the back when he chops his finger right off. Ed screams:

"AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH"

And Tom comes running in. Now Tom, he's a real stand up guy, A real quick thinker, so he wraps up the finger in a plastic bag, takes it to the doctor, and the doctor sews it back on.

About a week later, Ed is chopping meat in the back when he chops his hand right off. Ed screams:

"AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH"

And Tom comes running in. Now Tom, he's a real stand up guy, A real quick thinker, so he wraps up the hand in a plastic bag, takes it to the doctor, and the doctor sews it back on.

About a month later, Ed is chopping meat in the back when he chops his arm right off. Ed screams:

"AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH"

And Tom comes running in. Now Tom, he's a real stand up guy, A real quick thinker, so he wraps up the arm in a plastic bag, takes it to the doctor, and the doctor sews it back on.

About a year later, Ed is chopping meat in the back when he chops his head right off. Ed screams:

"AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH"

And Tom comes running in. Now Tom, he's a real stand up guy, A real quick thinker, so he wraps up the head in a plastic bag, takes it to the doctor, and the doctor sews it back on.

After a lengthy surgery, the doctor comes out of the OR, wringing his hands. "I'm so sorry, Tom. Your brother is dead", he says. "What happened?" asks Tom.

"Well", replies the doctor, "He would have been just fine, but someone put his head in a plastic bag and he suffocated"

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