Ted was the landlord of the Nag's Head pub. Every night, the same guys would turn up, have a few pints of beer, share a conversation and the occasional game of darts or dominoes. At 8pm every night, Ted would receive a visit from one of his other regulars - Champ, a stray dog who always came for a bowl of water and a few bags of pork scratchings. The regulars all loved Champ, and he was treated like the pub's mascot.
One night just before 8pm, there was a screech of brakes outside the pub, shortly followed by a man running into the pub in a state of distress.
"This dog, it just ran out in front of my car...I think I've killed it!"
Ted immediately feared the worst, and sure enough when he went outside, it was the heavily mangled remains of Champ in the middle of the road. Only Champ's tail remained intact.
Ted and the other regulars were in shock, but soon decided that they should have some kind of tribute to such a well-loved regular of the pub.
"Why don't we get his tail stuffed, and hang it above the bar?" suggested one of the regulars. This was thought to be a great idea, and shortly after a taxidermist was called and Champ's tail was stuffed.
On New Year's Eve that year, Ted was having a quiet drink after having closed the bar at the end of a successful evening. All of a sudden, he heard some scratching noises coming from the front door. "That sounds like Champ!" thought Ted, but one glance at the tail above the bar told him it couldn't be. He looked into his drink, shook his head and carried on drinking.
10 minutes later, he heard the same scratching noises. This time, he couldn't shake off his curiosity and made his way to the front door. When he opened the door, he recoiled with a huge fright; there in front of him was the ghost of Champ on the door step, looking up at him.
+I'd like my tail back, please+ came this voice inside his head.
"I...I...I can't d-d-d-do that!" stuttered Ted.
+I'd like my tail back, please+ repeated the ghostly form of Champ.
"I can't do that" replied Ted, having overcome his original shock.
+I have come seeking the return of my tail. I cannot transition through to the afterlife in such an incomplete state. Why can I not have my tail back?+ insisted Champ.
Ted glanced at the clock. It was now 3:30am.
"I'm sorry, but we can't retail spirits at this time of night."
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