Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

"Breaking Up Is Hard To Do..."
(especially when you share the same major!)


PSYCHOLOGY: Girl accuses guy of just using her as a substitute for his Mother.


SOCIOLOGY: Each claims to have been oppressed in the relationship.


RELIGION: Each prays for reconciliation and/or curses G-d


ARCHAEOLOGY: One tries to bury the past, and accuses the other of trying to dig it up.


THEATRE: "OH MY G-D! Life is... ENDED... as we KNOW it!"


BIOLOGY: "You just wanted to get in my genes!"


PHYSICS: Both resign themselves to the fact that what goes up must come down.


JOURNALISM: "Today was the end of an era. Jack, 19, and Jill, 18, called an end to their relationship of 2 weeks..."


WOMEN'S STUDIES: "HE did it!"


BUSINESS: Both decide that they're spending way too much money together, and that it's simply cheaper to be single.


HISTORY: Each party argues the breakup was caused by something the other party did in the past.


GEOGRAPHY: Both people decide to simply move far away to avoid each other.


ANATOMY: "I never liked your body anyway."


ECONOMICS: One party demands more than the other can supply.


ENGLISH: Each writes the other a perfect breakup letter, complete with introduction, thesis, body, and conclusion, that doesn't really say anything substantively intelligible.


EDUCATION: Both concede that the relationship was a learning experience.


COMPUTING: "Man, this bytes -- we just couldn't interface" and/or "His hard drive was more like a floppy."


E. ENGINEER: "It's just so shocking... I'm sure there are positives and negatives, but..."


ARCHITECTURE: "There just wasn't much to build on anyway..."


JEWISH STUDIES: "OY! You should feel so guilty!"


PHILOSOPHY: If 2 people break up in a dorm and there's no one to witness the breakup, are they really single?


ZOOLOGY: They were able to mate like banshees, but lacked sophisticated communication skills.


PHYS. ED.: They punch each other out in frustration.


CHEMISTRY: "It was just the wrong chemistry between us..."


COUNSELING: Each urges the other to, "Get help!"


MUSIC: Each utilizes an operatic lament (or, in some parts, a country song) to express his or her sorrow.


LAW: They sue each other for breach of a pre-dating agreement.