Bob's Gorilla Removal Service

So Fred wakes up one morning and strolls outside to pickup his newspaper, but before he can get to the end of the driveway, he looks up and notices a gigantic gorilla sitting in the tree in his front yard. Terrified, Fred runs back inside and flips open his phone book. After a long search, he finally finds a number for "Bob's Gorilla Removal Service".

*"Well, that's oddly specific"* He thinks, but he dials anyway.

"Bob's Gorilla Removal Service, Bob speaking."

Fred: "Oh thank God. Bob, I have a huge Gorilla in the tree in my front yard and I didn't know who else to call. Can you help me?"

Bob: "Sure I can, but I need to know one thing before I get there. Is it a boy gorilla or a girl gorilla?"

Fred: "I...I don't know. Let me run and check...*(after a brief pause)*... Oh, it's *Definitely* a boy gorilla."

Bob: "Perfect. I'll be right over."


About a half hour later, Bob arrives and unloads his truck. He lays out a ladder, a ten foot pole, a set of handcuffs, a chihuahua, and a 12 gauge shotgun. A bit perplexed, Fred asks,

"I hate to question an expert, but what on earth are you going to do with all that?"

Bob: "Well, I've been at this a long time and I can assure you this is the best way to catch a gorilla. First, I'm going to climb this ladder up the tree. Then I'm going to take this pole and poke the gorilla until he falls. Next, Buddy here *points to the chihuahua* is trained to run right up to that gorilla and bite him square in nuts. When the gorilla puts his hands down to protect himself, you slap the cuffs on him and I'll take him away in the truck."

Fred: "Well, I never would have guessed it, but that actually sounds like a great plan. But wait, what's the shotgun for?"

Bob's casual demeanor drops, and suddenly he is deathly serious when he says: "If I fall off that ladder, you shoot that Fucking Dog."