Wanting to be friendly, he walks over to the driveway where his new neighbor is repairing his car. "Hey neighbor!" he says affably.
Hearing the voice, a big shaggy dog comes running over and starts sniffing Bob's feet. "Hey," the neighbor grunts.
"I see you've got a dog! I've got a dog too!"
"What kind?" the neighbor asks, not looking up from the engine.
"Oh, ole Shep's a Collie mix. He's one of the smartest dogs I know!"
"That's nice," the neighbor acknowledges. "Fritz here is dumb as a rock, I can't teach him anything."
"Well, it takes time, careful training and hard work. Heck, it took even Shep weeks on end to learn how to play dead." Bob beamed proudly when suddenly his new neighbor shouted,
"Fritz! Get me the 5/8ths wrench!"
Bob watched in amazement as the dog ran over to the toolbox, rummaged through it and came running back with a wrench.
"Dammit, Fritz! You good-for-nothing idiot! Why can't you be more like ole Shep?!" he shouted as he gestured at Bob with the wrench.
Seeing the shocked expression on Bob's face, he apologized.
"Sorry about that. Stupid dog still can't even tell the difference between 5/8ths and 9/16ths."
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