Armless Man (NSFW-Language)

A man with no arms walks into a restroom. He approaches a urinal and turns to a man using the urinal next to him.
"Excuse me sir?"
"Yeah?"
"As you can see I have no arms, so I was wondering if you could undo my zipper?"
The man is shocked, but takes pity on the armless man, and agrees. He reaches down and undoes the armless man's zipper.
"Thank you," says the armless man, "but I also was wondering if you could pull out my dick for me?"
The other man is reluctant, but the overwhelming pity he has for the armless man takes over as he reaches down slowly and pulls out the man's junk.
The armless man's junk is green. It is covered in warts and reeks of tuna.
the armless breaks the awkward silence with "I hate to ask you for one more favor, but could you hold it steady while I pee?"
The man thought "why the hell not?" and reached out and held the armless man's dick for him. trying his hardest not to gag and trying to stand as far away as possible while still maintaining positive control of the dick. When the armless man finishes, the other man helps him put his junk back in his pants. As they're leaving, the man asks, "by the way, what the fuck was wrong with your dick?!"
The other man pulls his arms out of his shirt and says,
"I don't know, but I sure as hell ain't gonna touch it!"