Asks the bartender for a coke. Bartender says he's all out but he has an apple that tastes exactly like coke. The patron is skeptical but says, "aight, I try dat apple". Bartender reaches in and grabs an apple from a big bowl of at least 50 apples. Hands it to the guy. Guy bites in and can't believe how much it tastes like a coca-cola.
Minutes later another patron bellys up to the bar and requests a Crown and soda. Barkeep says, "How bout an apple that tastes just like a Crown and soda?" Customer says, "fuck it, alright". Bartender grabs another apple and gives it to this customer. "Holly shit!", exclaims the new customer, "this tastes just like a Crown Royale and soda". The bartender goes on tell the gentleman that he has an apple that tastes like anything they could want. Not long after another man comes to the bar. The first to guys say, "hey, partner, what you gettin?"
"Just a Bud", he replies with a grimace.
"Naw, mane, this bartender apparently has an apple that tastes like anything you want", one of the fellers tells him.
"Dat right, palooka?" The new guy hollas at the bartender.
"That's right, Ponchie" the bartender quips back.
"Aight, den, gimme an apple that tastes like pussy"
Without hesitation the bartender digs through the bowls and tosses the guy an apple.
The guys looks around with a face of doubt and irritation at an empty bar then back to two fellows at the bar both wearing the same shit-eating grin, nodding "gohead" in anticipation. He shakes his head and takes a bite.
"Pwahhh!!!" He spits it right out. "Dafuq, this tastes like shit!"
The bartender sighs, "ugh, turn it around"
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