A tourist is cycling through China...

... and stumbles upon a house when night gathers. He asks if he can stay for the night.

The owner says he'll gladly let him stay for the night under one condition: That the man will **not** touch his daughter.

The man says "pfff, you can trust me" and goes to bed. Later that night he sneaks to the daughters room and hilarity ensues. When he's done, he sneaks back to his room.

When he wakes up he sees that a large rock has been placed on his chest. On the rock is a note that reads:

* Chinese torture trick #1 Place rock on chest

The man laughs and throws the rock out of the window. As he does so he sees a second note

* Chinese torture trick #2 Tie rock to left testicle

Immediately the man throws himself after the rock. On the way down he reads the second line of the note

* Chinese torture trick #3 Tie doorknob to right testicle

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