They gather at the palace. The queen says: "Bring me your greatest weapon!". And so they went and came back. The frenchman brought a pistol, the american - an assault rifle while the russian is nowhere to be seen.
The queen got tired of waiting and said the rest: " now take those weapons and shove them up your arse!"
The frechman takes the pistol and shoves it up no problem, didnt feel a thing
The american is stuffing the rifle as hard as he can and keeps crying and laughing, crying and laughing
The queen asks:" why are you alternating between crying laughing?"
The american answers:" I'm crying because this hurts, jesus fucking christ. I'm laughing because the russian is driving over here with a fucking tank"
edit: forgot some words
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