A pygmy wants to be popular

However, among his tribe, he's nothing special. He's pretty small despite his 18 years of age, he's not particularly attractive and he's a bit shy. Then, it occurs to him. He writes a letter to the Guinness Book of World Records, claiming that he has the smallest hands of any adult in the world. He includes a photo of his hands as well as measurements. A month later, he gets a letter from Guinness, opens it, reads it and exclaims,

*I'm a Guinness World Record holder!* The whole tribe throws a party for the pygmy and before long he is as popular as can be.

Another equally unimpressive pygmy sees all the attention that the small-handed pygmy received, and writes his own letter to Guinness, claiming to have the world's smallest feet. Sure enough, a month later, he gets a letter from Guinness, rips it open to read it, and yells,

*I'm also a Guinness World Record holder!* This pygmy also becomes very popular among the tribe and goes to join the small-handed pygmy as the most popular pygmies of the tribe.

Sure enough, another unpopular little pygmy decides to get in on this action and writes his own letter to Guinness, outlining that he has the world's smallest penis. To no surprise, he gets a letter from Guinness a month later. Taking the letter, he walks out of his hut to the centre of the village. He opens his letter, reads it and exclaims,

*WHO THE &%#^ IS THIS JUSTIN BIEBER FROM CANADA?*