A marching band is celebrating after a win...

A marching band is celebrating after a win at the local band competition. Naturally, being college students, they pile into one of the local bars.

The clarinetists, saxophonists, trumpeters, and all the wind instrument players were discussing what to do for the next competition, when the lead snare drummer walks up, picks up her drum, and hits it extremely loudly. Shocked, the flutists end up jumping - while the tenor sax section ends up falling out of their chairs. Drummer gets marked a demerit, everything's fine.

A few months later, the band is back at the bar - having won the state band competition. This time, having mastered the band show, they manage to start playing Melee - they were, after all, a bunch of students. Snare drummer's back at it - except she decides to tell jokes off the Internet.

First joke, fine. Second joke was cutting it, though the third joke was strongly political and conservative. As expected, the single-reed single-payer supporters were extremely offended, and kicked the drummer out. Two demerits this time, and the drummer was ordered to apologize.

The season over, the band decides to throw a major party. Everyone was invited - with a few exceptions. The two tubists who volunteered as bouncers were letting everyone through when the drum line shows up.

"Can't go in here, you're not invited," the tubists say as the other drummers go in. "Says right here."

"Why can't I go? It says the whole band's invited," the drummer replies.

"We're not supposed to let in a registered sax offender."