A man dies and gets to the pearly gates

At the pearly gates he is greeted by St. Peter who is standing next to a ladder that rises up into the clouds.

"Welcome," St. Peter said, "to your great reward."

The newly deceased man stood speechless looking around, trying desperately to process and understand the reality of the view that stood before him. His eyes wandered over to the ladder. As he looked it up and down, St. Peter notices his fascination. He smiles and informs the man that he may enter paradise there, through the pearly gates, or he could climb the ladder to success.

The man stood silent, considering his options, as well as the odd fact that heaven might have a ladder, let alone one that would lead to success. He figured, however, that he was already dead, and his luck could only really go up from here.

He walked over to the ladder, giving one last look at St. Peter and his pearly gates, and started to climb up into the clouds. Below him, fading into the haze, St. Peter's welcoming smile.

The man climbed until he reached another level of solid ground, or rather what might be considered solid ground in heaven's cloudy plane. He hopped off the ladder and stood in front of another gate, this one gold. There was no St. Peter this time to usher him in to eternity. In his place stood two beautiful women, easily two of the most beautiful he had ever seen, on this plane or in life.

They greet the man and inform him that, like below with St. Peter, he may enter paradise there or climb the ladder to success.

The man looked up at the ladder which stretched still upwards into the clouds. He had neglected to consider that there might be more after this. As before, he considered his options. He quickly came to the conclusion that he would be an absolute fool to not continue upwards.

He bid the lovely ladies farewell and continued his trek upwards to success.

Again, the man reached another solid stretch of clouds that held yet another gate and two new women in front. The gate this time, however, was a shimmering platinum that seemed to reflect or even glow with all the glory heaven might offer. This gate's keepers were two even more beautiful women who, as each other entity had done before here at the entrance to the afterlife, inform him of his option to enter heaven there or to climb the ladder to success.

While he was in awe of the beauty, this time he barely took his foot off of the ladder before he was right back on it, smiling like a little child who finally understood Christmas.

He climbed to the next level, hopping off the ladder and tripping over himself, giddy at the prospect of the next site he might witness. Just like his previous experiences so far, he was not disappointed.

His eyes looked upon a site his years on earth had given him no vocabulary to describe. I am also sad to inform you that even I, telling you this story, fail at finding words. This was the gate to paradise. This was the promise of providence and the testament to both the power and the glory that was spoken of in psalms and uttered on the breaths of billions and billions of tiny prayers whispered by souls forgotten in the eternal ether. This gate was the proof those prayers were heard.

The man learned the meaning of the word "awe" as he stood slumped,
Slack-jawed, and speechless as his tearing eyes took in the site.

From seemingly out of no where walked this gate's keeper, a woman whose beauty was unmatched. She appeared to the man to be the sum of all of existence's beauty, grace, and kindness. She met the poor newly-lost soul with a tender caress, speaking, "Poor, wanderer, I know you have come so far to reach here, not just climbing, but with the long, testing journey that is life. Here," she grabbed his hand and led him to the entrance "you may enter and receive your great reward."

The man stood in front of eternity frozen, letting a gentle breeze blow across his cheek, through his hair, and through his fingers. He smiled a true, honest, pure smile.

The peaceful moment was broken by the angelic creature, who, again, placed the same offer in front of him as before: "You are free to enter here, but the ladder to success continues on, if you wish."

For a moment, the man thought that this
might be enough. Why push it any farther? On the other hand, look at what he was able to witness! How could he not continue upwards? What could possibly be next?

"It is your choice: enter here, or continue on the ladder to success."

The man backed away, almost painfully, and started walking one slow, agonizing footstep at a time towards the ladder. He got to the ladder, put one foot on the rung, and gave one last gaze upon the wonder before him as he climbed upward.

At the next and, as he would soon find out, final plane, the man hopped off the ladder. He looked up and saw it didn't continue on into the clouds! He had reached the top! He had climbed to the top of the ladder to success!

As he eagerly awaited the final glory, he watched the ladder to success disappear and the hole it came through close. He stood looking out on an endless field of clouds, looking for a gate.

This time, though, there was no gate and no girl. Out from the distance walked a big balding man in sweats and a tank top scratching his nuts.

Shocked, the dead man asked the new figure, "who are you? Are you God?"

"No," the being replied, "I'm Ces."