He's met at the pearly gates by St. Peter, who consults his book and tells the man that his sins weigh almost evenly against his righteousness and the angel is having a hard time deciding whether to let him into heaven.
"Listen," says St. Peter. "Tell me of a selfless act you performed to convince me you are truly good."
So the man says, "Well I was driving across the state one time and I saw a group of bikers dragging a screaming woman off road, away from her car. I pulled over and ran to them shouting to let her go."
"Well that certainly was brave," said St. Peter. "When did you do that?"
"About five minutes ago."
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