A homosexual guy died and went to Heaven. Back on Earth he had a big problem. Whenever he saw someone bend over he couldn't contain himself and started butt-fucking the person. When it was finally his turn to see St. Peter in front of the gates of Heaven St. Peter said:
"I'm sorry buy homosexuality is a sin. I can't let you into Heaven."
The man responded:
"Please, I am a good person, I promise I will change my ways, and I will stop harassing others.
St. Peter thought about it and decided the he seems like a good guy, so he will give him a chance. But just before opening the gates, his sandal came loose, so he bent over to tie it, and the man just couldn't control himself, and started butt-fucking St. Peter. St. Peter obviously got very upset, and condemned the homosexual to Hel.
A few months have passed and St. Peter started thinking what happened to that guy. He forgave him for what he did, because he knew that inside he was a good person, so he decided to visit Hell and see how the man is doing.
As soon as St. Peter got there, he knew something was wrong. The pits of fire were all put out, people were walking around shivering, and the whole place was just freezing. He found Satan, shivering on his throne and asked what was going on in Hell.
To which Satan replied:
"You just try to pick up some wood and see what happens!"
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