A Donut's Vacation

So there's this donut and his birthday is today. It's Sunday and the donut says to himself..."You know what I think I'm going to take the day off and go enjoy myself." The Donut hasn't taken time off in about 3 months so he decides that he's going to go spend the day down at the local pier.

So he goes to the pier and starts rolling around or whatever donuts do. He's at the pier for several hours before a man walks up to him and says "Hey you know I've seen you rolling around here for a while, do you need help with something?" The donut replies to the man "It's my birthday today and I'm not sure what I want to do." The man laughs and says to the donut "you know I heard there's a cruise ship pulling out of here in a couple hours...if you make it down to the travel agency I'm sure you can grab a ticket and have yourself a few days to relax!" The donut replies "you know what? That's a great idea, I think I'll do just that...yeah I could use a few days off from work." The donut quickly runs back home packs his bags and gets a ticket from the travel agency and boards the cruise ship ecstatic for his journey.

"Wow, this is amazing!" the donut says. The donut's having a great time on the cruise, he's rolling around the decks, tanning in the sun, sprinkles blowing in the wind...whatever it is donuts do to have fun. So the donut gets this great idea all of a sudden..."gee it's my birthday today, I think I'll ask the captain if he'll let me drive the ship...after all it is my birthday! That's not a bad idea, why not?!"

So the donut goes up to the bridge and says "Captain Captain it's my birthday today can you please let me drive the ship." The Captain says "No get the fuck out of here!" and he kicks the donut out.

The donut looks confused and goes back to his cabin for a bit...then he says to himself "you know what? I bet the Captain was just really busy when I went up there, I'll just go up there and ask him again. He definitely won't turn me down this time!" So the donut goes back up to the bridge again and says to the Captain "Captain Captain can you please let me drive the boat, it's my birthday today I'd love to drive the boat!" The Captain says "No, get the fuck out of here, if you come up here again I'll have you thrown overboard!"

Again, the donut looks disappointed and returns to his cabin and takes a nap for a few hours. He wakes up and says to himself "You know, the Captain must have been really busy earlier! If I go back up there now and ask to drive the boat there's no way he'll turn me down! He just can't!" The donut rolls off eager as always and makes his way to the bridge. He rolls into the bridge and says "Captain Captain will you please let me drive the boat?"

 


 
What do you think happens next?

 

 


 


 

 



*The Captain threw the Donut overboard.*

 


 


 

 


 


 




So a man decides he's going to propose to his girlfriend, he's absolutely in love with this girl so he's got the perfect proposal planned. He takes her out to this bluff overlooking the ocean. It's a beautiful sunny day. The man set up a picnic and the two are jamming out to music on his iphone...everything is going perfect.

So he finally feels like it's time to propose...he bought her the most expensive beautiful ring that he hand picked at the jewelry store. He spent his entire life savings on this ring. He reaches out into his back pocket and as he goes to get down on one knee to propose he slips and drops the ring over the bluff into the water...gone forever. His whole life savings wasted away. His girlfriend looks at him and says "You know what, I love you and I want to marry you anyway. I know it'll be hard but we can make it work!"

So a couple weeks pass by and the couple have been having to work long hours to pay their bills. They decide that they should go out for a nice expensive date to relax from all the extra work they've been doing to make up for the ring he bought. The man takes his fiance out to a nice expensive seafood restauraunt and he orders himself a nice lobster and she orders a plate of hot steamy oysters. Just as his fiance opens the first oyster she screams and drops it on the table. The mans eyes are wide open in shock at what's inside...

 


 

 

 


 


 

 


 


 

 


 


 




**IT'S THE DONUT!!!!!!!!!!!!**


 


 


 



This is a great joke to tell your friends. It's especially great if you want to get someone in particular since this joke can be told in two parts, the donut part and the proposal part. I've even spanned this joke out over several days...or just as little as ten minutes. But when you finish telling the joke to whoever they usually say "the ring" and look like and idiot when you tell them the real answer. The longer you let this joke ride the better the laugh, since your friends are usually pissed off after the donut gets thrown in the water.