You've ever cut your grass and found a car.
You owe the Taxidermist more than your annual income.
The UFO hotline limits you to one call per day.
Directions to your house include turn off the paved road.
You prefer to walk the excess length off your jeans rather than
hem them.
You smoked during your wedding.
Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.
Your two year old has more teeth than you do.
Your checks feature pictures of dogs fighting.
You have an above ground pool and you fish in it.
Your father walks you to school because you're in the same grade.
You've ever been accused of lying through your tooth.
and probably the grosest one of all times.....
Your mother has ever come out of the bathroom and said "ya'll
come look at this before I flush it."
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