Wrong size

There once lived a man named Jack. Jack was very unfortunate in that that he eyes having always bulged out every since he hit puberty. It was a very big problem for Jack, because no girls were every attracted to him. The bulging eyes were a big turn-off.


Finally, after some consideration Jack goes to the doctor with his problem, always too embarrassed to go in the past. After closely listening to Jack's problem and after long examination, the doctor tells the Jack that there's only one way to solve Jack's problem, and that way is to cut off Jack's balls.


Jack completely rejects the solution at first, but then begins to think that what good are his balls if he can't get laid anyway. And, since his bulging eyes are keeping him from getting laid in the first place, maybe losing his balls for the sake of looking normal wasn't such a bad idea.


So, a day later Jack returns to the doctor and tells him to cut off his balls. Jack goes through with the surgery, and behold, the day after the surgery he looks into the mirror and finds that his eyes are no longer bulging out. Very happy with his new look, Jack decides to treat himself to some new clothes, go to a club, and get fucked.


Based on recommendations from friends, Jack goes to a certain tailor to get some new clothes. As soon as Jack comes in, the tailor says, "Stop! Don't say anything! I bet I can tell you all your clothes sizes without you telling me anything or without my even using a measuring tape."


"Take your shot," says Jack.


The tailor says, "Ok, your shirt size is large, your pants waste size is 36, your pants length is 32, your underwear size is 38, and your...."


"Ha!" interrupted Jack. "You are wrong, my underwear size is 34!"


"That's impossible!" exclaimed the tailor, very puzzled, "If your underwear size was 34, your eyes would be bulging out like crazy!"